NeS2 Post 1872
NeS2 Post 1872 flips between the past and present as Britt the Legend continues, while the NeS Heroes determine their next course of action. After Britt gives Marquis Rosslefot a new and profitable idea for a new Engine, he claims royalties. Instead of royalties, Britt agrees to let the marquis invent a transportation Engine for them instead. He, Ohqeanos Simon and Polly Simon travel back to find the American Hulk and, after he has beaten the Espa-nol Security Forces, they discover that he is now capable of speaking and seemed to have been reduced in size as the super soldier serum is wearing off. They return to the Marquis and they, along with Kaptin Kwanza, use the Engine to travel. However Britt wanted to go back in time, to get the centuries he lost back, while Polly wants to go to Jupiter - thus they are sent to 1555AD on Jupiter and are met by Michel Nostradamus. In the present Rob X informs the heroes that Gebohq Simon has now gone through the plot-hole along with their Cult leader, Brittica X. The Cult of X decide to follow Antestarr to seek out their leader while Losien Simon reluctantly decides to save their Story instead. When Rachel Pi protests aggressively, she is talked down and her father, Emperor Pi, takes both her, LightSide and the baby Lior away as they are in harm's way with the heroes. Frank Smith calls his boss, Chronos, who tells them to just ask the Hands of the NeS instead. Gwenhwyfar reveals that the Hands are now both dead and have been usurped completely by Venedite. She arrives with a note of all the Seals that The Last True Evil seeks to break and they go down the list to try to guess where he will go next. What they don't know is that he pays a visit to the Convenience Store of the Damned with malicious intentions for the proprietor, Mr Stafford. Post Britt: The Legend - Chapter Thirty-Seven Britt: The Legend - Chapter Thirty-Seven Britt: "So can you build a new one of these engines, Russlefoot?" Marquis: "Fot." Britt: "What?" Marquis: "Not foot. Fot. It's the 'o' sound from words like 'pot' or 'not'." Britt: "Alright, alright." Marquis: "And it's Rossle, not russle." Britt: "Geez! Alright, Bunghole!" Marquis: "Bun-- I say! It's Rosslefot!" Britt: "You're Bunghole from now on." Polly: "What my friend is trying to say is that he's sorry for mispronouncing your name and really wants to know if you can build a new engine with which to travel between planets?" Marquis: "Easy! In fact you have such engines here." Polly: "Without a spacecraft." Marquis: "Ah. More difficult. But for an inventor as comprehensively fantabulous as myself, child's play." Ohqeanos: "Fantabulous?" Britt: "I told you, he's a bunghole." Polly: "Have you seen my fiancé's name written down, Britt? You're complaining about his name?" Britt: "He's pompous. And he made my hand itch! Do you know how long I'd gone without a mosquito bite!?" Polly: "No." Britt: "Not long enough! Why not make a machine to cure itchy hands!?" Marquis: "There's a novel idea I hadn't thought of before. I should get on with that right away." Britt: "Whoa, hold on. That was my idea! I claim patent! I expect royalties!" Polly: "He has a point, Marquis." Britt: "Really? Awesome! I'm going to be rich!" Ohqeanos: "You've lived for, like, centuries. Why aren't you already rich?" Britt: "Graverobbers. They come in and nick everything I store with me when I sleep. I should have had someone set traps or something." Polly: "Actually, we'd settle for an engine that can get us to Jupiter." Britt: "What? No way! I want the money!" Polly turned and glared at Britt with eyes that could split a rock in twain. Britt gulped. When she relaxed her gaze, Britt's courage re-emerged and he pouted. Britt: "Great. So old Britt has to save your bloody wedding, does he? Well this is your wedding present! Don't expect another!" His accusing finger moved from Polly to Ohqeanos. Ohqeanos is stunned. Ohqeanos: "But I didn't--" Britt stormed away and Kaptin Kwanza went after him. Marquis: "Well, I'm glad that could be worked out. Of course I'll build you your machine as payment for that momentary burst of inspiration. I imagine my new machine would sell very well on the swamp planet of Insectania. Lots and lots of biting going on there. And that's just the locals!" Polly: "Right. So, when will it be finished?" Marquis: "For your average inventor it'd take, maybe, five years." Polly: "...great." Marquis: "Ha! But I'm no average inventor! Give me two hours and consider it done." Polly: "That gives us enough time to fine and sedate that experiment your government owns." Ohqeanos: "Oh right. I forgot about that." In Rome. Losien: "Okay, so this Brittica X woman is somewhere with Gebohq--" Rob X: "Unless they're dead." Losien: "--and she's a cultist leader dedicated to X. Which you won't tell me what X is." Rob X: "That about sums it up." Subaru: "She's not a villain, Losien. She was so close to killing Helebon. Greatest evil we've heard of. Or one of them." Losien: "How can we track them?" Amal: "I hate to be the one to say this but... do we have time to go searching for Geb?" Losien: "What do you mean?" Amal: "Have you forgot why we came here? The vault?" Losien: "No vault to guard now! It was broken open by..." Miss Fire: "TLTE... that traitor." Losien winces at the mention of TLTE. Her love. Once upon a time. Now... traitor. Losien wants to save her brother. That's all she cares about. But she's the leader of the NeS Heroes and as leader she has to think about the NeS. She nods slowly. Losien: "You're right..." Rachel: "What? No! Losien!" Losien: "We have to save the NeS, or there'll be nothing for Geb to come back to, Rachel. Chronos said something to me before we left London. She said, something like, the vault is just one seal that will be opened. And when the seals are opened, the Eep will descend upon us. I think... I know TLTE will try to open those seals now. It's... who he is. Who he truly is." Rachel: "No! No, damnit, no!" Losien: "Does anyone else disagree with me?" Nobody. All guilty faces. Rachel: "Then I'll go find him myself. Again!" Losien: "No you won't." Rachel: "You think you can order me about now?" Losien: "You have to think of your baby, Rachel. It's too dangerous for you to be alone. You shouldn't even be here with us." Rachel: "You can't stop me, Losi--ah..." Two firm, old hands come to rest on Rachel's shoulders. She slowly turns around to look up into the eyes of her father. Emperor Pi: "Listen to your friend, Xue Jing." Rachel: "She is not my friend." Emperor Pi: "She cares about your safety and the safety of your child. That makes her a friend. And a good one." Rachel starts to cry in the arms of her father. Rachel: "B-b-but my..." Emperor Pi: "If there's one thing I have learnt about your fiancé since meeting him is this... he is resilient." Rachel manages to nod. Emperor Pi: "I rather feel he has to be to marry someone as stubborn as you, my girl." Rachel: "Heeeeeeeey..." Emperor Pi: "I'll take care of Xue Jing." Subaru: "Antestarr is looking for them, Rachel. I'll tell everything as soon as Antestarr let's us know." Rachel wipes her eyes. Rachel: "Okay. Thanks." Emperor Pi pauses then looks towards Lior. Emperor Pi: "I feel my daughter is not the only one that should be coming with us." LightSide sighs. It's completely true and yet she doesn't want to leave the group or her husband behind. She looks at Al Ciao. Al Ciao: "He's right. I... I should come with you." LightSide: "I think you're needed here, Al." Al Ciao: "But... but what if something happens to me... then who will--" LightSide: "Make sure that it doesn't." She wraps her hand around his neck and kisses him. Al Ciao: "I love you." LightSide smiles. LightSide: "I know." She turns and takes Lior from Rob X, who looks a little disappointed at relinquishing the baby. She walks over to Emperor Pi and Rachel. LightSide: "You can join us when you can, daddy." LightSide waggles baby Lior's hand at her father. Iriana Emp: "I'll make sure he does." LightSide: "Thank you, Iri." Miss Fire: "I'll keep the idiot safe for you, LightSide." LightSide: "Then I know he's in good hands." Emperor Pi raises his hand and snaps his fingers. A moment later there's a tremendous gush of wind and Long Xiang lands behind his master with a loud thud. When the gondola is loaded up, Long Xiang takes off again and soars up into the sky. Al Ciao stares after them. Iriana Emp: "Will you be okay, father?" Al Ciao: "I don't know, Iri... I don't know..." Rob X: "Well, we have to go too." Evil G: "Now you don't have a baby to play with?" Rob X: "No! We have to find Britt. Besides, Antestarr's practically an honorary member of the Cult of X so we should go with him. If he can find Britt, we've got to help him. And then we find Gebohq too. I want to see Geb safe as much as you guys. He's an old friend of mine too." Losien: "We're trusting you to find them, Rob." Rob X: "We won't let you down." The Cult of X start in the direction that Antestarr had headed earlier. Evil G: "What about us, chief? What do we do?" Losien: "I really have no idea. Apple-- I mean Chronos... she just said there are seals and they'll be broken. The vault was one and we failed to protect that one..." Amal: "No one could have known what un... what TLTE would do..." Evil G: "Are all these seals just vaults lurking around the planet then?" Losien: "No idea." Miss Fire: "Have any others been broken?" Losien: "No idea." Frank Smith sighs. Frank Smith: "Hold on. Let me try to contact HQ. Since the Mysterious Person is talking to me now and doesn't want to arrest me..." Losien: "Mysterious Person?" Frank Smith: "Turned out to be Ch--" Chronos: "Alright, alright, I'm here. What the Hell's the emergency?" Chronos is dressed like she's been working behind a desk and even has a name-tag that they all read as "Apple". Losien: "Why--" Chronos: "None of your beeswax. What do you want?" Losien: "Don't forget who you're speaking to, young lady!" Chronos groans. Polly: "You're acting like a stroppy teenager, Apple." Chronos: "I'm just busy! Okay? I'm like a super secret agent right now and you guys are totally getting in the way." Polly: "I hope you're not getting yourself mixed up in anything dangerous, Apple!" Chronos: "No?" Polly: "She's hiding something, Losien. You should spank her." Evil G: "Whoa! Dude. Please. This is my sister, I really don't want these kinds of fantasies!" Polly: "She's not your sister." Evil G: "My sister by another mother. Whatever." Polly: "Another mother and another sister." Evil G: "Honestly, you're just as annoying as my own mother. Seriously." Polly: "And what happened to your version of me, by the way?" Evil G glares at Polly Simon but doesn't speak a word. Chronos: "Please, father. Grandmother. Tell me what I can do for you so I can get back to doing important stuff!!" Losien: "You mentioned to me, totally off-camera so nobody else heard you or even read it, that the vault is just one of the seals to be broken. What are the rest?" Chronos stares at her father with a glum and annoyed expression. Chronos: "Why are you asking me this question? I'm the Time Lady, or whatever you want to call me. I'm not your soothsayer! Ask your God damn Hands of the NeS! That's what they're here for, isn't it?" Evil G: "Good point..." Losien: "Apple! You're becoming very rude and very arrogant. I'm disappointed in you." Chronos pouts as defiantly as she can through sadness and welled up emotion. Chronos: "Well! Who's fault is that!? You raised me!" Losien: "Thand raised you." Chronos: "That's right! And where were you, huh!?" Losien: "I wasn't even born! Stop arguing with me!" Chronos: "Fine. I'm sorry for being so rude. I really am just too busy to be showing up here whenever you need me to solve some riddle for you." Losien: "Too busy to see your own mother?" Chronos: "I see my own mother everyday. That's me. You're my dad." Polly: "Apple! Zip it!" Chronos: "Bu--!" Polly: "Zip it!" Chronos: "Gr--" Polly: "Ziiiiiiiiip it!" Chronos' lips are pursed together in a frown. Polly: "Now give your father a hug goodbye." Losien: "Mother." Chronos stomps over to Losien and wraps her arms around her biological parent. Chronos: "Father." Polly: "And now give your granny a big hug too." Chronos: "Granny? You look younger than me!" Polly: "What did I say about this back-chat!?" Chronos 'zips-it' again and hugs her grandmother. Chronos steps away from them. Chronos: "Ask your resident Hands. They should know what to do." Losien: "Goodbye my love." Chronos: "Bye... dad!" She disappears just as she starts to laugh, giving no time for Losien to rebuke the 'dad' claim. Evil G: "Well that was a waste of time." Polly: "I got to see my granddaughter. I'd never call that a waste of time." Miss Fire: "How do we contact the Hands of the NeS?" Losien: "That should be easy." Losien shouts out to the sky above. Losien: "Oi! Bhac! Mayaal! Get down here!" Nothing happens. Evil G: "Another waste of time. You're on a roll today, Losien!" Gwenhayfar: "There's something I should probably tell you..." Britt: The Legend - cont. Britt, Ohqeanos and Polly lie belly-down on a grassy hillock and watch the army camp below them. In the centre of the camp they can see the Hulk asleep in a cage. Britt passes the binoculars to Polly. Britt: "So the plan is to sneak in there and wheel away that cage? How do we get past the guards exactly?" Polly: "You put them to sleep. Easy, right?" Britt: "Not sure I can get them all." Polly: "One at a time should be fine. You put them to sleep as they come and no one will ever be able to sound the alarm. And just in case they do head there, Ohqeanos will destroy the alarms." Ohqeanos: "I will?" Polly: "Yes y-- uh oh." Ohqeanos: "I don't like uh oh..." Polly: "Guess who's awake." Ohqeanos holds out his hands expecting his turn with the binoculars but she hands them back to Britt. Ohqeanos sighs. Britt: "He's awake. He's broken his cage. He's chasing guards around..." He lowers the binoculars. Polly: "So... change of plan. We wait for him to kill all the guards, then we go in and put him to sleep." Britt: "That's a bit grim. You're happy for him to go killing all those soldiers and their clockwork rifles?" Polly: "Do you want to go down there?" Britt rolls onto his back and looks up at the stars. Britt: "Not really no." Polly follows suit and then Ohqeanos. Britt: "Look at those stars... somewhere out there... is Earth." The sounds of gunfire, explosions, screaming and shouting drifts on the wind. Polly: "And Jupiter. It's a wonderful place. You're going to love it, Br-- I mean Ohqeanos." She looks at Ohqeanos with an apologetic look. Britt: "If it's anything like last time I was there, you're going to hate it, dude." Ohqeanos: "Yeah..." Britt: "Is he still there, by the way?" Polly turns back to Britt. Polly: "Who?" Britt: "Marduck." Polly: "Uh... you mean the god?" Britt: "Who else!? Big... bird face. Actually his body was more birdy. His face was all human and chomped people!" Polly: "Marduck is... a myth. Like all gods, Britt." Britt stares at Polly with shock. But realises they're a little close for their head to face each other without getting intimate. Britt sits up. He could only think of Marduck chomping down on the bones of Ptolemy. He starts to feel queasy. Ohqeanos: "The battle's over..." Britt turns around. Ohqeanos is already belly down again and peeking through the binoculars. Ohqeanos: "I see the monster." Polly: "Great." Ohqeanos: "He's... just sitting there..." Britt: "Worn out from all that exercise, I imagine." Ohqeanos: "But he... he never gets worn out." In Rome again. Losien: "That's... unbelievable..." Evil G: "I suppose the only way anyone could have taken them out would be by tricking them." Losien: "But... poor Mayaal..." Evil G: "C'mon! Really? You're upset? They were a pair of stuffy, old codgers that just sat around bickering like old women! Who cares? Mayaal barely ever talked to you guys and Bhac was always sticking his nose into the villains' business, where it most certainly wasn't wanted." Losien: "You're so heartless..." Evil G: "Yeah, yeah, yeah. So sue me." Evil G looks up and shouts out. Evil G: "Venedite! We need you!" It took a moment but eventually there's a poof of pink smoke and from it emerges Venedite, in a lingerie nightie made of black silk with a white fur collar. She ties the nightie tight. Venedite: "A woman can't have five minutes peace." Losien: "I can't believe you killed Bhac and Mayaal..." Venedite: "Really? You know I already had an epic fight with Mayaal a while back and became Hand, right?" Losien: "But you did it! Like... they're gone! Gone gone!" Venedite: "Could you put this in writing because I've got sex waiting for me in the l33t." Evil G: "Awesome. Who?" Venedite: "Nosy parker. Highempress." A few gasps. Iriana Emp: "You mean... my alternate reality self? The evil one?" Venedite: "I prefer to think she's just misunderstood. And she's very good in bed, I can tell you. Wait a minute. Wooooow! It's you!" Venedite slinks over to Iriana and wraps her arm around her shoulder. Venedite: "Little lesbian girl, right? Newbie and fresh to the seedy world of lesbianism!" Gwenhwyfar: "Not every lesbian is as seedy as you, Venedite." Venedite: "They are after I've gotten to them!" Her laughter trills through the air. Losien: "We need to know about the seals." Venedite: "What seals? What're you talking about?" Amal: "The seals that, I think, TLTE is trying to break." Venedite: "Huh... no idea!" Evil G: "Another waste of time." Losien: "This time I agree with you..." Venedite holds up her hands defensively. Venedite: "Now, now! Don't get your knickers in a twist!" She then smirks. Venedite: "Unless you want me to help untangle them!" She laughs again, enjoying her own jokes. Venedite: "I'll look into it for you and report back. Chief." She salutes in a mock, sexual fashion. She walks back to Iriana Emp. Venedite: "What about you, sugarplum? Want to have sex with your older, grumpier self?" Iriana: "Uh... not especially. No..." Venedite: "Oooo! You're so adorably innocent! I could eat you all up." Evil G: "I bet." Al Ciao: "Okay! Enough of this! That's my daughter you're talking to. And you've made her very uncomfortable. She's not ready for that kind of talk." Venedite: "Five minutes with me alone and she'd be ready for everything, daddy dearest." Al Ciao: "Uh... don't... talk sexy at me. I'm married and weak-willed." Venedite: "Lucky for you, I deal with the fairer sex only." She suddenly spins on heal to face everyone. Venedite: "I'll be back in a jiffy!" Poof. She's gone. Britt: The Legend - cont. Britt, Polly and Ohqeanos approach the base as quietly as they could manage. The Hulk was sitting on a box at the gate. He stared at the tarmac and didn't budge. Somehow he looks smaller, weaker and less of a brutish monster but Britt thought it was just a trick of the low light and his meeker posture. Polly: "Okay. Dose him in tea and we can drag him--" Hulk: "No." The beast didn't look up. Hulk: "Don't... do it." Britt, whose hands were already raised, leant over to Polly without taking his eyes from Hulk and mutters. Britt: "He's... talking... what do I do?" Ohqeanos: "Can you... understand us?" Hulk: "Yes... I... understand." Britt: "I've never heard him speak so much before." Ohqeanos: "The drugs are diminishing. I don't know what's going to happen to him now. He could become the small guy he used to be... he may balance out... he may..." Hulk: "Die? Will... I... die?" Ohqeanos: "Hopefully no. Do you know who we are?" Hulk: "Americans!" Britt: "I'm Roman actually... and she's from Jupiter. Not even close." Ohqeanos: "I'm American!" Britt: "Suck up." Polly: "You have a green card." Ohqeanos: "It counts!" Hulk: "American... I protect... American." Ohqeanos: "That's great. You're not going to... go ape?" Hulk: "I am... in control. America... is in control." He stood up from his box and finally looked up at them. Britt was now certain he had lost some size and was beginning to look more like an overly muscular man. What the scientists had put the man through seemed horrific to Britt now. How they had changed his body and mind. Hulk: "We go." Polly: "Yes... we go." The Hulk started to walk after them as they led the way back up the hill and away from the base of carnage. Britt: "Off we go to Jupiter then. As long as our new friend stays out friend and doesn't hulk out again." Ohqeanos glanced back. Ohqeanos: "I trust him. He's... a true American." Back in Rome again, Venedite has reappeared and handed Losien a piece of paper with Venedite's terrible handwriting on it. Losien: "Does this say 'Evil trumps?' That's just gross." Venedite: "Evil true! True! That's easy to read!" Losien: "Oh... makes more sense. And here... converted prenatal?" Venedite: "What? Coveted potential!! Someone else read it!" Polly takes the letter and begins to read how each seal would be broken... Polly: "Evil true will break out imprisoned evil with imprisoned evil." Amal: "That's what he just did, isn't it? He broke the vault with the villains in using that... sword. The darkfoil, with the villains trapped inside it." Miss Fire: "And now they're all free to roam the Earth again." Polly: "Evil true will break the heart of an empire and its heir..." Polly pauses and a flash of pain crosses her face. Everyone sees it but nobody comments. Even Evil G manages to keep his mouth shut. Polly looks at Losien and Losien averts her mother's sympathetic gaze. Losien lost her lover. Polly lost her home. Venedite gently takes back the paper and offers to continue for Polly. Venedite: "Evil true will break its coveted potential to resurrect its own." Evil G: "It's not going to work. Your voice is way too sexy to listen to without getting aroused." Venedite: "My dear boy..." Al Ciao: "He's kind of right." Iriana Emp: "It does leave one a little flustered." Venedite smirks at Iriana again but Iriana just snatches the letter. Iriana Emp: "How about if I read it... where were we? Evil true will break its coveted potential to resurrect its own... what could that mean?" Light dawns on Amal. Amal: "He... killed me..." Frank Smith pokes Amal's arm. Miss Fire: "You seem pretty alive to me." Amal: "I mean... my..." Frank Smith: "Your Potential..." Amal: "I mean... how... he just..." Amal turns away and walks off, needing time alone. Clearly he hadn't expected his own 'uncle' to try to take something so precious from him, of all people. The betrayal is now more raw than ever for Amal. Losien: "So he has now broken that seal too..." Iriana Emp: "Evil true will break ground for the forgotten to be remembered." Subaru: "But... the Forgotten are now Remembered, aren't they? We did that!" Losien: "And TLTE was a NeS Hero... we helped him break that seal..." Evil G: "Unless... unless there's something we haven't considered..." ---------- TLTE opens the shop door and the bell above him tinkles. He stands and takes in the scene for a moment. A typical, small-town convenience store. Nothing special. Nothing out of place. The guy behind the counter looks at him blankly. TLTE: "Hello. I wish to speak with the manager. Mr Stafford." He cracks his knuckles. ---------- Britt: The Legend cont. Britt: "Alright Russlefoot, we're back!" Marquis: "Rosslefot!" Britt: "Bunghole!" Marquis: "Such a callous youth!" Polly: "The Engine?" Marquis: "Ready. You must be exact with your co-ordinates or you could wind up travelling across the galaxy, breaking into the next universe or going back in time to meet the dinosaurs. If this planet had dinosaurs." Britt: "Yours had dinosaurs?" Marquis: "Of course! Given the right co-ordinates we have a lovely spot where you can go hunting. Ride a triceratops and everything!" Britt touched the machine. Britt: "It goes through time and space? So, we go somewhere but we can go to the past of that somewhere?" Marquis: "That's right." Britt: "I know when I want to be. That bloody Marduck cost me centuries throwing me through space. I want to go back." Polly: "No! We're going to Jupiter, Britt! Stop!" They both start pressing buttons on the machine and ... BANG!!! Britt opened his eyes. He was still with Oheanos, Kaptin (who had remained with the Marquis earlier), Polly and the Hulk. However they had now changed location. Britt: "Damnit. This isn't Earth! This is bloody Jupiter!" Polly: "... is it?" Britt looked around and nodded. Britt: "Absolutely. Don't you recognise it?" Polly: "Some of it... but it's different. This is... you've taken us to the past Britt!!" Britt: "The past of bloody Jupiter! There's no way I'm getting thrown to Earth this time. I demand a spaceship." Ohqeanos: "You wanted to come to 1555, Britt?" Britt: "What? No! That's way too late!" Ohqeanos holds up a newspaper. Ohqeanos: "And it's from Earth too." Polly: "That's impossible! Britt is the only person from Earth to ever come here." Man: "Not quite true, young lady." Britt: "Who the buggery are you?" Man: "Michel." He shakes Britt's hand. Michel: "I'm a follower of yours, Britticus. Britticus the Legend it is! How marvellous. I predicted you'd be here! Curious though. Your aura tells me that you've come quite a bit further than Earth and... you're not of our time." Britt: "Aura?" Ohqeanos' jaw drops. Ohqeanos: "I know who you are!" Michel: "Well I did just introduce myself!" Ohqeanos: "Nostradamus!" Michel: "The family name. Yes." Notes Britt's Commentary "The 'zip-it' joke is a references to Austin PowersAustin Powers (film series) article, Wikipedia. film series." ~ Britt the Writer. References External References Category:Post Category:NeS2 Post